i know everyone makes fun of ya dystopian fiction and books like the hunger games or divergent, etc. like “lmao one teenage girl can’t save the world” but uhhh
that is literally????
what’s happening?????
right now?????
like idk about you, but i can smell a revolution coming
and she’s leading it.
This is the funniest thing ever, everyone else go home
make sure before any exam you are adequately hydrated!!!!!! so u can CRY when they hand you the test!!!!!
learning how powerful it is to say “this is what i feel” and “this is what i want” and firmly standing by it
heatherleigh02-deactivated20230:
cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food
old people: let me speak to your manager. This never would have happened in my day. And yet you all want the minimum wage raised. I’m going to kill you.
cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food
millennials: okay, my apologies. I apologize for the inconvenience. I’m sorry I’m here.
me, walking into a store: are you guys busy? i can come back later. please don’t push yourselves on my account. things happen
Had a baby boomer in front of me at the Dairy Queen. She INSISTED she was a Blizzard EXPERT and there was simply NOT ENOUGH chocolate pieces in her blizzard and she wanted to complain to “whoever is in charge”. She’s going on and on with this teenager. The teenager is calmly explaining they make them all the same etc etc procedure etc etc. But this woman is now yelling at the teen.
So I walk past the woman and put money in teen’s tip jar. Haven’t even gotten ice cream yet.
Woman looks at me. Turns back and yells some more with the teen. I put more money in the tip jar.
The teen smiles at me. The woman can’t think of what to say to me and stops yelling, because I’m looking at her dead in the eye like “atm is over there, I can go all night. The more you yell at her, the more money she makes.”
Aggressive generosity to combat boomer selfishness is so punk
i dont need a date i need cash
cat when I’m snuggling him: I’ve never met you in my life. you bastard. you fiend. stop this at once
cat when I’m busy doing something and can’t pet him right that second: Where Is My Kisses From Mommy??? Where Is My Snuggles And Cuddles That I Crave So Dearly. You Are A Cruel And Unjust Mother And I Am Going To Scream
why doesn’t biblical art ever depict the Snake from the tree with legs. God took away legs from Snakes because the Snake in the tree right? So why doesn’t he ever have legs!!!
This is all I am able to find
wuipghpuuhgpaw why does it have a human face why does it have boobs
Boobs? Those are his
Snitties
Cats (2019)
The first funny bitch was Cain, who straight up lied to God after killing his brother.
God: where’s Abel?
Cain: fuck if I know??? I’m not in charge of him
It is TRAGIC that you can’t read this in the original Hebrew.
God: Where’s the Sheepkeeper?
Cain: Do I LOOK like a Brotherkeeper?
God: hey where’s Abel???
Cain: